I did get to act my age (or at least a couple years younger) tonight with some kids of friends of the family. I felt somewhat left out, but also finally like I was on the right path. Doing the wrong thing felt more right than the right thing has lately. Going to France and finding myself cannot come soon enough!! I need to get through school so I can start my quest (to find myself) as soon as possible! I'm going to start listening to French books on tape when I sleep so I absorb the language. Dr. B. would be so proud- and probably have something entirely inappropriate to add :) I kinda miss taking her French 5 class... sometimes.
I know this sounds bitter, but seeing people happy makes me sick. Not that I want their happiness to go away, I just don't feel like witnessing it. I'm bitter, and frustrated, and would probably do best to stay locked up for a bit. Or shipped off to a beach somewhere I can veg.
All I want for Christmas/belated Hanukkah-maybe Chrismukkah- isssss- I have no effing clue. But it's probably sold out.